THE SHINE JOURNAL

Flash Literature, Poetry, Art and Photography!

ON LOVE

 

by

 

Diane Seacrest

 

 

 

Her eyes were almost black in color and her hair a dark brown. I stared into her innocent eyes not knowing how I was ever going to take care of her. She squirmed and cooed as I held her close, I was afraid of breaking her. I cried when I looked at her, wondering what to name her, I finally named her Desiree. I counted her toes and her fingers to make sure they were all there. I couldn’t believe how innocent she looked, how I was going to care for her alone.

 

Her father and I separated when I was four months pregnant, he didn’t believe she was his child. I wasn’t able to work while carrying her since I had complications; I had to live with my parents at 20. I thought I was too young to have such a beautiful child. I thought about giving her up when I first found out I was going to have her, but, I realized there must be a reason for me having her. I struggled for months while I was sick trying to keep the weight on and finally on March 4, 1996 she was born.

 

Mom and dad thought there was nothing like her since it was their first grandchild. They took her places and always had something for her when they came home. I was planning on going into the military the first year she was born but at the time I only weighed 100 pounds. I was a couple pounds off and needed my GED; I finally decided to get a regular job. I didn’t realize that I had a reason for not getting into the military. I found out when Desiree hit two years old.

 

I let mom and dad have guardianship over Desiree because I thought I would need to travel for the marketing job I got. I thought it over after signing papers that I wouldn’t go anywhere. I found out that summer that mom had Leukemia and dad had Melanoma. I worked while my parents spent time with their grandchild until they both could no longer take care of her. Desiree and I took care of them instead, she gave both my parents and I the greatest gift of all and a miracle. I wanted Desiree to see mom the day we decided to turn off the life support. If she were to see them that day, she would have nightmares for the rest of her life.  My parents later passed on with a smile on their faces because they were able to have a grandchild.

 

The day of the funeral Desiree hugged the casket and cried. She couldn’t understand why mama and papa were not there. “Don’t they love me anymore mommy?” She would ask me that question over and over. I couldn’t do anything but hold her closer. That day while the minister did the sermon Desiree stood up while he talked and proceeded to walk to the caskets. She kissed the pictures and laid roses next to the picture and said “I love you mama and papa.” I couldn’t help but cry because, I knew my little angel had no clue what was going on. She walked up to the minister and said, “Mama and Papa will be back for me, and Jesus told me so.” I think the minister cried after hearing her say that because he picked her up and finished his sermon. She helped read Footprints in the Sand; no one had a dry tissue in the whole church after that.

 

Today Desiree is nine years old and she still thinks of her grandparents. She has a big picture hanging over her bed that she blows a kiss to every night. She prays to God blessing everyone and tells her grandparents that she is taking care of me, for them not to worry. I am glad I kept my daughter, that she was able to meet her grandparents. We look at the stars every night together wondering how they are. Desiree and I still stick together through holidays because it hasn’t been that long since mom and dad passed on.

 

We realized that counting on each other during a crisis is the only thing we need.

 

 


Diane Seacrest Shares...

DIANE SEACREST  is a mother and a wife. "My inspiration for writing has always been the experiences of life. Life can sometimes make a great story." She has written articles for Millionaire Magazine and is working with a friend to publish an inspirational story about peoples' lives. She believes that, "Writing is life, life is writing it all down."

The author's contact information: dianecheek@hotmail.com  and  http://www.readingdestiny.highpowersites.com  is her web site.